K.

For most of us there are certain truth-communicators who somehow seem to have the key to our heart; it is as if those deep intangible ideas of our soul are somehow better accessed and recognized in the profound expression of these heroes.

One philosopher who I find myself connecting with in this way is Søren Kierkegaard.

Kierkegaard, specifically in Sickness Unto Death, posits the position of humanity in one of constant anxiety or dread. This dread, explains K., is due to the unique nature of mankind; we are dialectical creatures of spirit and flesh, of earthly and divine components–we are finite and we are infinite, and because of this dialectical composition we are in a position entirely different than other mere earthly animals. We have FREEDOM. And it is this freedom that is the source of dread.

There are two ways that people attempt to find solace and comfort in face of the starkly uncomfortable reality of freedom. Both of these strategies entail negation, for one thing is always easier to deal with than two. There are some who reject the earthly and finite aspect of their identity; they solely embrace the divine and infinite and retreat into mystical solitude. These are the Gnostics and Mystics, those who wholly reject the world in favor of establishing an identity that is transcendent.

The other negation is much more common and perhaps easier. This way of coping with dread centers on the rejection of the divine and spiritual nature. While the rejection is rarely total, it does affectively shut out the Divine from influencing in a meaningfully real way. Here the deification of the self occurs subtly as we elevate our fleshly rationality, desires, and understanding to the rank of chief arbiter and Judge.

The result for those who take one of these roads is despair; it is K.’s sickness of the soul, and it is fatally destructive, for the whole person at his or her core level is not one or the other, but both, and to deny part of an essence is to deny the whole.

Anxiety, I think, is impossible to avoid. I have fears and desires for the future, and I have freedom too to choose my path; to embrace a God who created me whole, who does “know the plans he has for me” and to seek solace in a peaceful surrender and trust, or I can do my best to destroy anxiety by destroying part of myself; by either claiming freedom totally, or denying it entirely.

So, this is the struggle of living out identity in Christ.